Fighter or Giver?

In life, when you encountered an issue that forces you to the end of the road, what do you do?

Jump off the road or push your way through the fogs in hope to get freed from it?

I always chose the fighter path. Giving my all, making sure that I've done my very best. As I do not accept failure, I do not accept defeat. This is me.

However, something occured recently and made me reflect my fighting stance. Why do I have to fight all the time. Why do I always try to fight and achieve my very best?

My answer, I value myself. my life. It is in me, to fight for my rights, my needs, my wants.


Fighting and negotiating is different. I do negotiation, but I do not compromise if I'm at the losing end. I fight for justice, fight for fairness, fight for basically anything so as to allow me to be at the same platform as you and I.

Recently, I had a hugest fight with someone dear to me. Hurtful words were spewed, splattered and left stains everywhere. Cleaning up these can be a difficult process, but well, I am willing to do it, if there is a purpose.

Purpose, is something we all need. A reason to make you strive. A reason to make you do something you do. A reason for you to be there, doing what you're doing.

However, I find no purpose to clean up the mess. I find no reason why I should be cleaning it up BY MYSELF.

I'm very sorry. I cannot and do not want to do this anymore. I'm tired. I'm sick of all these. I do not want to fight anymore. I wanted to believe it is worth continuing, but I've been proven wrong again and again.

I hope you'll understand me one day.

I've tried my best and fight with all my might. I am conceding defeat and failure. I'm sorry, very sorry for not wanting to continue fighting anymore.